Peeling Carrots is for Wussies.: Day 9 (Stage 6): GRUPETTO and Taking 20% of Numbers

Stages 2, 3, 4, and 5 were all very strenuous in their own way for me, so with the infection and 4 more stages in the mountains at altitude before the rest day, I needed some rest. This is a fantastic time to talk a bit about the relationship between the stage profile maps in the race bible, and the actual stage profiles. Here is today's:

NOTE: Only 2 categorized climbs today. The first being only a Category 1... This is a lot of BS

Ahhh yes, I remember it well, 3 hours into the stage somewhere in-between the two categorized climbs already with 2000m of climbing wondering "What asshole built this road?" If you don't know much about biking, here is a quick note. On stages like this, often times there is a group of guys who end up coming in far behind the leaders, its a group that has decided "today is not my day" for any number of reasons:

1. Being Fat (a sprinter)

2. Being Tired

3. Being Sick

4. Being Unmotivated

5. Saving energy for future stages

6. Being reasonable (probably my favorite reason)

Lets not forget, after all, we PAY to do these races. While it is true that most pros also get paid to do the races by the team they ride for, it still is interesting that when it comes down to it, our team pays an entry fee for stages like this. So riders can fall off the pace and ride together in the interest of RECOVERY for 6 and a half hours.

Annnnyways. I hate the grupetto. Since I have some disease that prevents me from doing reason #5, I often end up there because I am some combination of the other ones, aside from #6, and that sucks. Thankfully an old teammate and friend Jon Murphy came up to me with 2 hours to go and recommended we tell each other drinking stories to see how long we could go without checking how long we still had to go. This was a good tactic.

Near the end of the day a German rider comes up to the whole group yelling "Ve hav to RIDE, i spoke with the COMissare, Z time cut is NEIGH!" (This is an accurate impression, totally not offensive) This German rider was incorrect. Time cut was 20%. I asked him "What is 20% of 1 hour?" to which he yelled (spoke normally?) "I ASKED Z COM, VE HAV TO RIDE" Which is the wrong answer. The right answer is 12 minutes. It is easy to assume then, using math, that time cut was going to be 6x12 minutes, which is 72 minutes, which means we could have all stopped at a market, bought feathered and roasted a chicken, and been on our way with chicken snacks and STILL HAD 20 MINUTES TO SPARE. Whatever. That guy wrecked my easy day a little, and for that I despised him and will make fun of him mercilessly for the rest of my life.

Since not a lot happened today, lets take a second to review a few more of the finer moments of being in China!